Play Your Position!

Play Your Position! 

Yup! I am going there! I was originally inspired recently by "Weinergate"! I have been biting my tongue to say the least. I had become slightly reserved on the whole issue, when I heard a woman phone the local radio station to "air out" her so called "boyfriend". It appears that she had been dealing with this guy for over ten months. He had taken the "road" of "not being happy at home" (yeah-yeah). Somehow she made mention of blowing the lid off of the relationship, when he decided to tell his side of the story first. By the time the story was told, the "side piece" was now labeled as a stalker. 

Now we can all be critical of the "side piece" however, we all know someone that fits that bill! You know your role when you enter any relationship. You also know who you are dealing with by the end of the first month. Lets be clear, I am not talking about "Catfish"; I'm talking about someone that you get to see physically. You know when you get two hours after work for drinks or walks in the park what it is. You know when your hitting the "short stay" motels what it is. 

You can attempt to stake a claim on this person, but; you can't get mad when they don't take the bait! You can attempt to "handcuff" that person and rope them into a steady relationship but is that really what they want? Understand that a player is going to be a player and there is nothing you or anybody else is going to do that will convince him/her that you are "the one". As a matter of fact, due to the fact that you are enabling this person to carry on two lives, chances are this person has NO value for you! You are not known by your name - your new name is "Wednesday @ 6pm". That's when you are seen. If you do your homework you will see that chances are, you are not the only one! There may be others at work, church, school, on the block, or even at the club. You are happy with your time slot and you better be or else you get cut off! 

So what happens when you start to be overcome by emotions that you let in? You start to get angry! You start to get vindictive and plot on a way to get this person back in your life, or get back at this person. What we have here is someone that "did not play their position". You have to realize that whatever values you may have had when everything started you have to go back to. If you find that this relationship is not turning out the way you wanted you have to turn and walk away! You just have to know when to hand in your cards and fold. Not everyone is able to play the game. Many relationship experts will tell you, never get into a relationship with someone while they are in a relationship. True words! Allow that person to walk away first, then make yourself available to him/her. If you choose to get involved before that point, know that you have a position to play and you cannot allow yourself to get caught up emotionally. 

With that being said I will ask, are you able to conduct a relationship without emotions involved as a side piece? Can you get involved without the need to destroy "the happy home"? This discussion is not for the weak at heart, get in where you fit in. If you was the "side piece" before, I want to hear from you. If you was the main piece and tolerated this I want to hear from you! This is open dialogue people - lets talk about it! 

TOP SHELF TWINKIES!

PEARL GABEL FOR NEW YORK DAILY NEWS writes: 

Empire Cake’s answer to the reborn Hostess Twinkie

America’s favorite snack cake is back on the market, and New York City eateries have linked to the Hostess hype with gourmet twists on the Twinkie.

The company’s treats disappeared from store shelves last November after the firm went out of business due to a labor dispute. Private equity firms Apollo Global Management and Metropoulos & Co. bought the brand, and began rolling out the sweets this week.

In New York, however, there also are outside-the-box twists on the Twinkie, like passion fruit-filled confections and a Twinkie milkshake Here are some of the sweet alternatives:

 

Chip Shop’s Fried Twinkie boasts a four-berry coulis.

Deep-Fried Twinkie at Chip Shop

Owner Chris Sell of Park Slope’s Brit-inspired fish and chips joint, Chip Shop, deep-fries just about anything — including Twinkies. The mini-cakes are battered in flour and water and fried until golden in the same oil as the fish to add a unique flavor. The fried pastry is topped with a four-berry coulis (sauce) served in a plate for $3.50.

129 Atlantic Ave. & 383 Fifth Ave., Brooklyn, (718) 855-7775.

 

The Brooklyn Blackout cake at Empire Cake

Brooklyn Blackout and Passion Fruit Twinkies at Empire Cake

The bakers at Empire Cake in Chelsea put a gourmet spin on the Twinkie. Their most popular versions are the Brooklyn Blackout, chocolate cake infused with chocolate pudding, hand-dipped in Callebaut bittersweet chocolate, and the Passion Fruit Snack Cake, featuring vanilla cake with passion fruit curd filling, dipped in Callebaut white chocolate. Both are available for $3.

112 Eighth Ave. (between 15th and 16th Sts.), (212) 242-5858.

Red Velvet Twinkie at Stanton Social

The Stanton Social makes a Twinkie that will have you seeing red — literally. Its signature Red Velvet Twinkie ($4) is infused with cream cheese filling and topped with a dollop of whipped cream.

99 Stanton St., Manhattan, (212) 995-0099.

Twinkie Ice Cream Shake at A.G. Kitchen

Chef Alex Garcia pays homage to the comfort treat at A.G. Kitchen on the upper West Side with a Twinkie Ice Cream Shake of vanilla ice cream, whipped cream, strawberry sauce and, of course, bites of Twinkie ($7). For a happy-hour treat, spike your sip with strawberry-infused rum for an extra $5.

269 Columbus Ave., (212) 873-9400.

Twinkie Churro at Amigos

For sugar and spice, sink your sweet tooth into Twinkie Churros ($7) at Amigos in Morningside Heights. The Mexican-style eatery will serve deep-fried Twinkies sprinkled with cinnamon sugar and a decadent side of warm chocolate dipping sauce this week to celebrate the Twinkie comeback.

Source: NY Daily News

Who new that the Twinkie comeback would transform the household treat to a delightful delicious desert?

TRUE MEANING of LOVE!

True Meaning of Love

What does it say about you when you think you know everything there is about "love"? I guess what I'm getting at is, do you really know what "LOVE" is? One definition courtesy of The Urban Dictionary says, "the most spectacular, indescribable deep euphoric feeling for someone". Dictionary.com says " a profoundly tender,  passionate affectionate for another person". Amongst other things it also says, "sexual passion or desire". While we can go on with many definitions from various sources, the main idea is that you have someone or something that makes you feel euphoric and passionate at the same time! When your with that person the feelings are heightened and you are out of your "normal". From the outside friends and family can see and feel your euphoria! Friends want to be around you! Single friends want to be you, and those that are involved with someone special are happy for you! 

It has been said that relationships are a compromise. We have all created that list of what we must have, and what we are going to tolerate; What we don't want and won't tolerate! 

The question of the day is what will you tolerate, and what won't you put up with? 

Feel free to leave your comment and interact with each other...

COULD THIS BE YOUR REASON?

Arguing about money could spell disaster for your marriage:

Arguments over money is the top predictor of separations in couples

Arguments are more intense, last longer, and take more time to get over

Couples also use harsher language with each other

Predicts divorce better than rows over sex, children and in-laws

When it comes to relationships, money really does matter according to new research that has found that rows about money are the biggest single predictor of divorce.
The study looked at 4,500 couples over several years and found that stress over finances topped the list of predictors of separation for both men and women.
Couples who argue about money may are seen as more likely to get a divorce than those who row over other matters including sex, children and the in-laws.

They say it's the root of all evil! What does money say about your relationship? How much of a value does it hold in your household?

Financial argument were also found to be longer in length, and couples tend to use harsher language during them.

 

Arguments over money predict later divorce for both men and women.

This was true regardless of a couples income or debt level, and the arguments can date back years, sometimes to before a couple was even married.
Sonya Britt, assistant professor of family studies and human services at Kansas State University says
‘You can measure people's money arguments when they are very first married.
‘It doesn't matter how long ago it was, but when they were first together and already arguing about money, there is a good chance they are going to have poor relationship satisfaction.’
The longer these disagreements go on, the lower the relationship satisfaction will be, resulting for some couples in divorce.
Chartered Psychologist Kim Stephenson says: 'We know that the rate of 'financial infidelity' (lying, concealment, dishonesty generally about money) is on the increase in both the UK and US, based on figures since the financial crisis in 2008.
It's also been true for some time that financial issues are a major source of marital discord, for example, financial concerns are stated as the number one reason for couples to consult Relate.’


 

GUILTY PLEASURES...

What is that one thing that makes you say I shouldn't have done that? Who or what takes you there and makes you say "Damn, I shouldn't have done that?"
I think we all have something in our lives that make us say, I should have thought about that before I did it.

Have you ever "smashed" your mates friend? and continued because... and why?
Have you ever shopped and had to hide the purchase from your significant other until you know they are not home then you bring it in?
Have you ever been fired your job and not told your spouse?

So what is your "Guilty Pleasure?"

DEAR Magazine - The Re-Launch Video

The Re-Launch of DEAR Magazine. A brief description of what we are about!

Your comments and concerns are truly appreciated.

My Push up Bra will help me get my man

Let's Talk About It....

Ladies and Gentlemen, I came across this video on You Tube and thought "how ghetto is she?" I could not help to think that there are many that think like this. Lets get this conversation started the right way.

Ladies is there any truth to the whole "push up bra" thing? Gentlemen, are we really that shallow, that we look beyond all her faults including the "Kool-Aid hair?" "IMJUSSAYIN"

Let me know what we are really thinking and what really matters. In my opinion she is GHETTO! She is about to pull up on a "sit-e-ation". She better hope the other woman isn't drinking water....

Check out this great MSN video: How to Get Your Ex Back

Check out this great MSN video: How to Get Your Ex Back

Infatuation Begins... Young Too!

Courtesy of Worldstarhiphop.

While on one hand I say, 'Awwwwwwww". On the other hand I ask, "what are we setting ourselves up for?"

She Got That Flow...

courtesy of worldstarhiphop...

While a lot can be said about her flow, tell me what you think.

Bx, Stand Up!

If You Don't Tell....

Trey Songz has come a long way in this business. The ladies love Trey...

With that being said, this video was posted on Worldstarhiphop and had me thinking. Ladies, you are the ladie on the video, your touched and caressed and invited backstage... Question do you follow through? Do you eventually tell your significant other?

Fella's let a brother know, where is the line drawn. Where do you draw the line and say, its okay she is still coming home to me.

Just curious... "imjussayin"...

Hold Your Head- You've Touched Many Lives...

We sometimes cannot control our emotions, and often regret the actions taken in order to prove a point. With that being said I say, Hold your Head. You have "infected" us all in some way, shape or form. You came home from prison and made an impact that gave a lot of brothers hope and will continue to give a lot of brothers hope.

I had the pleasure of meeting this brother and speaking with him @ length. No, not in an interview setting, just a casual setting as I drove the brother around then on to the studio. One of the most humble brothers you would ever want to meet. So to Lyfe Jennings, I say hold on brother, "We got you". Your career is here for you when you get home. Good music and lyrics never die.

Definitely a message in your music. Check the message in the video!

Nuff Said!

As I read through this article posted on MSN, I could not help but think, this could have some validity. However this would go for males and females, not just GUYS!
Ladies, some of you know - these tips apply to your'll as well...

I will respond as the interaction goes on....

His Dating Diary: 9 Signs Your Guy Is Cheating
Are you suspicious that your significant other is playing the field? Here, one man shares 9 relationship red flags that may signal some extracurricular irregularities.
(By Rich Santos/Marie Claire)

When you get suspicious that your significant other is cheating, be careful not to appear to be paranoid. You have to walk a fine line — you don't want to make false accusations.

So, while I'm sharing this list of cheating red flags, I concede that it's a tricky situation. It's hard to be sure if someone's cheating, but protect yourself: Be vigilant, and pay attention to your mind and spirit within the relationship. But, at the same time, be careful not to let anxiety lead the way because unnecessary paranoia will just drive your lover away. Here are some red flags that may signal that your significant other is cheating:

1. Less SexUnless he's Superman, he can only have so much sex. So, if he's getting it from another source, you might notice. Whether it's another woman or a porn addiction — even if he's not cheating — a decrease in sex signals serious issues in the relationship.

2. Jumpy Cell Phone HabitsIn a perfect world, we'd be open about sharing our correspondence with our significant others. Most of the time, we trust that we don't have to worry about who is texting or calling them. But, if you notice that he is getting protective and/or nervous when he gets calls or texts, it may be cause for alarm.

3. Gushing or Talking About Someone SuddenlyYou know that exhilarating feeling you get when you meet someone new and exciting? You want to tell the world about him. One of my exes began talking about a guy a lot near the end of our relationship — he just always seemed to be at her social gatherings that I didn't happen to attend. Sure enough, after she dumped me, she began dating him.

4. DisconnectingEven though relationships ebb and flow naturally, if you're sensing that he's drawing away from you, then there may be someone else. Emotional disconnection should be investigated regardless of whether it's caused by cheating. There's a problem if he's not laughing or seeming as passionate as usual. It's hard to spread love/passion between two people, so the person who used to have it will feel it slipping away if it's being given to someone else.

5. He's Pulling "Houdinis"If he's disappearing, traveling, or unavailable to the point where you are starting to wonder, then he could be cheating. Also, these times tend to take on a pattern because it's tough to synch up schedules, especially in secret.

6. His Friends Are Acting StrangeHis friends will certainly remain loyal to him in most cases. They will not let you know what's going on, but they will definitely be racked with guilt, and their behavior may change slightly when they are around you while protecting his secret.

7. He's Being Caught in Lies About Other ThingsIf you catch him in a lie, your trust will naturally be damaged. Don't hold a grudge — forgiveness is a good thing. You can forgive, but don't forget. If he consistently breaches your trust, it's establishing a pattern of behavior that leads to cheating. Do yourself a favor: If he keeps lying, whether these lies are big or small, get out while you can and don't let him talk his way back in.

8. Been There, Done ThatI always say: "Once a cheater, always a cheater." If he's done it before, he's definitely capable of doing it again. It has nothing to do with you, which is why you can't say that he cheated on his previous lover because she didn't keep him happy. Cheating is a self-serving act in which the cheater doesn't take his significant other into consideration. If someone is upfront with you that he's made mistakes in the past, maybe give them a chance —— but make it a long probationary period before you let your guard down.

9. Your Gut Tells You SoDon't ignore your sixth sense. People are gifted at sensing when something doesn't feel right. Whether there are red flags in your relationship that are clueing you in or not, if something feels off, don't ignore this feeling. Usually that suspicion is correct, and something intangible may have led to you figuring it all out.

The Gray Area

The Gray Area

As i read the post of D Woods on Global Grind, I couldn't help but to think "sad". Of the many artist that have sailed through Bad Boy and the like of many other labels how many really have had and still has a substantial career. Never mind the fact that you are attempting to fulfill a dream. When fulfilling a dream remember that the dream is yours and not the label that you are signed to.
With that being said, as an individual that has been in the background of the music business for many years, I encourage all artists to take their careers into their own hands. Do your homework, look beyond the change that the labels will post to your account quarterly (shorts). You are probably worth more to yourself and your career than you are to the label. Do the math and realize the profits are yours if you follow the mindset of a hustler. Remember - "Life is a hustle", and unless you are willing to hustle for it, you may be standing alone short of the finish line.
While I have friends and associates that have had lucrative careers in the music business, this is far and few in between. For every one friend that I have that has made it, I have three that are struggling to reach that level. Even today....

Do your homework and due diligence and seek the rewards that are truly yours.

C Browne
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A Woman Knows...

A woman knows a lot of things. A woman is strong enough to make decisions that some men won't. While the next thing that you might read may throw you for a loop, I ecourage you all to chime in on a discussion that I often have with some of my brothers out here.

The statement is that "A woman knows within 60 seconds of meeting a man if she wants to sleep with him". Now while I disagree with the statement - I have to remain neutral. My thoughts are simply; a "woman" or a "lady", or anyone of substance may have a thought or two when meeting an individual - but; that's not it.

Now I've been wrong before, (once upon a time), so please once again - let's get to the bottom of this one. Sign in and get in...
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I Knew it Was Too Good To Be True

http://m.cnn.com/cnn/lt_ne/lt_ne/detail/212966;jsessionid=2627B7E597F1C144AC829FB000470B7B.live23i
How can it happen after such a steep decline?
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If it Walks Like a "DUCK" and Quacks Like a "DUCK"...

Then "DUCK"... We shouldve known he wouldve ducked out of the way of that one. He has been able to duck the issues or "His Shoes" for years, in order to promote his own agenda. Hey George DUCK!!!!!

The Holidays... Are They Really Festive for All?

As we approach the holiday season, whether it be an office party or the family dinner; remember that not every one is as festive.



Some people are approaching the holiday season lonely and against there wishes. While on the outside you will probabaly never know, deep down inside there is a bit of pain amongst the joy.

For help on this matter I say check out these tips http://tinyurl.com/wfffr and lets all have a safe and great holiday season.

One More Drink... Now that one could be a problem

So I really have to wonder; How many have been in this situation before. One more drink, and that guy or girl starts to look like the mate of your dreams. You didn't know your limit, and now... Not to mention the morning after.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WBMpaFiX7bw